1 Peter 3:7 KJV

⁷ Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.

Colossians 3:18-19 KJV

¹⁸ Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord.

¹⁹ Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them.

If there’s anything that will make a marriage succeed, it is honour. Connect this to the law of precedence, and you will get a full understanding.

The word ‘honour’ in Greek means ‘to set a value on something’ or ‘to fix a value.’ That word means: God has set a value on the husband and on the wife. This is the office of the husband and the wife. God places a value on it, measures it and places honour on those offices. And no human being has a right to lower the value or negotiate the value that God has set on those two offices. Therefore, you have no right to devalue your wife. Always remember that your wife takes precedence over your sister and your mother, and let that be clear to everyone. When your sister enters her husband’s home, she’s that man’s wife. One of the late politicians in Nigeria used to call his wife his “Jewel of inestimable value.”

If you have watched some of the older people that have been married for a long time, some of them for 40-50 years, you will find that they practised the law of honour in their relationships, even though some of them were not born again. They stayed with the same man or woman, as the case may be, honouring each other. You probably also notice that after some time, they started looking alike. There was the mixing of their lives together, they found something that God has written in the Bible, and they practised it. Yet many born-again Christians who read the Bible today and hear God’s word preached in Church continue to misbehave and disrespect each other. You cannot dishonour your wife and have God bless you, and you cannot dishonour your husband and have God bless you.

The law of honour will give birth to the right use of words. When God made the woman, He brought her to Adam to see what he would call her, and he said she’s Eve, the mother of all living; she’s bone of my bone.” The absence of honour or incomplete honour is responsible for the trouble in many marriages.

Sadly, there are many homes today where the man treats his wife as though she is one of his property in the house. Women today don’t even have a voice in their husbands’ lives. When a woman tells me something and says, “Please don’t let my husband hear”, if I had respect for that man before then, that respect goes all the way down. If your wife is scared of you, you are a tyrant and a terror; you need counselling! That is the closest human being to you.

When a real man shows up, his presence spreads peace, security and assurance. In fact, the degree of confidence that your wife and children have in your presence is a testimony of how strong and effective your leadership is.

That your wife and kids are trembling at your presence is a sign of insecurity in your life. How can a woman spend fifty years of her life with you, and she can’t talk? That means you don’t honour her; you don’t even know what a woman is.

These are basic principles that you need to start applying in your life; they will turn things around and change them for the better.

It doesn’t matter where you started on the marriage ladder. When you start treating your wife or your husband with honour, you will glorify God for where it will take you. So, honour your husband and see whether he will change or not.

A woman’s role is directly flowing from the status of her husband. A wise woman adds honour to her husband because the honour you add to your husband is the honour that flows back to you in his life. And it is a wise man that does not allow anybody to dishonour his wife because that is your glory. Man is God’s glory, which is why God attaches so much honour to man. Of all the creations of God, there’s nothing that can demonstrate God-like man; that’s why the devil wants to enter into man to do the worst possible. God is jealous over us, and He says the way I am jealous over you, the way I put honour and glory over you, do the same for your wife. You must use words and actions to honour your wife.

God calls that man your head; that head is not a physical head; he is your covering in the spirit. He’s your shield in the spirit. There’s an anointing in a man’s life that heads a home, which provides a covering for things to grow and flourish under his leadership. One of the marks of a wise woman is the honour she gives her husband within and outside the home. I know a woman in this country who has a big ministry in Nigeria and overseas with her husband. Some years ago, the woman told God, saying, “God, if this man fails, hold me accountable.” She was, in every sense of the word, better than the man in the things of the spirit, but she knew that man was her head, and she took up the task, and the man stepped into his place in life. Sometimes, when a woman sacrifices like that, she might be apprehensive that she might be cheated, but I assure you that if God is there, He will not allow you to be cheated because there’s a legitimate fear that a woman will sacrifice and make a man to succeed like that only to lose out at the end.

When a woman gives up everything to help you get ahead in life, when things turn around and become good, that’s the time to let her share and, indeed, bask in your success.

The law of honour will certainly strengthen your marriage. Honour your husband; he is the King in your home; husbands honour your wife; she is the Queen in your home, your palace.